FLAVOR: Paradise Fresh
BRAND: Colgate Luminous
ADA ACCEPTED: Yes
TOOTHBRUSH USED: Oral-B something-or-other
Colgate Luminous "Paradise Fresh" is the toothpaste equivalent of Jimmy Buffett: kinda shitty. Jimmy Buffett sings about tropical islands and drinking margaritas and eating cheeseburgers, but his songs are actually terrible. Colgate Luminous "Paradise Fresh" comes in a purple tube with a picture of a diamond and a palm tree on it, but it tastes like mint and makes me want to throw up (not unlike Jimmy Buffett). Why would a toothpaste called "Paradise Fresh" taste like mint? Shouldn't it taste like piña coladas? And why would they put a picture of a diamond on it when it clearly did not turn my teeth into diamonds? Also, Jimmy Buffett sucks.
—Michael
